Parents Victoria keeps hearing about aggressive parents in schools—and yes, there are a few extreme cases. But let’s not forget: most parents are doing the right thing. They support teachers, follow school expectations, and just want the best for their children. It’s unfair—and unhelpful—to tar all parents with the same brush. We should be celebrating the quiet majority who partner with schools, not painting them as problems.
Media portrayal of parents
Often the media narrative paints parents as hostile or difficult, especially toward teachers and schools. As ACSSO points out in their media release this week , this is a distorted picture that ignores the overwhelming majority of parents who are respectful, supportive, and deeply invested in their children’s education.
The vast majority of parents work in respectful partnership with their school. They attend meetings, follow procedures, support learning at home, and trust teachers’ professionalism. Media need to lead with an intention of care and stop using extreme cases to define the entire parent body and escalate fear and apprehension in the teaching profession. Most parents are partners, not problems.
A common goal
Parents and teachers have a common goal: helping children succeed. Most parents value and respect teachers and want to work together—not against them. Parents don’t want confrontation—they want collaboration. When communication breaks down, it’s usually from frustration, not aggression. Building trusting relationships between families and schools is key to student success. Parents and teachers are on the same side.
When parents raise concerns, it’s usually because they’re advocating for their child—not because they’re being difficult. Important distinction – Advocacy is not aggression, on many occasions parents feel unheard or powerless, especially in complex systems. PV stresses the need for empathy and active listening in schools, especially when parents raise sensitive issues. Parents are advocates, not adversaries.
Build bridges, not walls
Instead of blaming parents, let’s talk about how Governments can invest in schools to better engage and support school staff —especially during times of stress. Schools that actively invest in positive parent-school relationships report fewer conflicts. School culture and communication channels play a big role in how parents react. Let’s build bridges, not walls. Governments need to invest in school human resources (family engagement liaison staff) to enable effective parent engagement.
When parents hear that they’re being called ‘abusive’ or ‘aggressive’ as a group, it’s demoralising—especially when they’ve always done the right thing. This hurts the parent-school partnership, which is proven to be crucial to student outcomes.
Finding better ways forward
Where there’s conflict, schools need support structures—not zero-tolerance rules that alienate families or worse, banning them is unproductive and impacts on the children too. Instead of just pushing “codes of conduct” or “zero tolerance” policies, promote relationship reparation to set relations right, conflict resolution training and parent-school mediation programs.
Thousands of parents volunteer on Parent Clubs and School Councils, they help on excursions, raise money, and trust teachers every day—but we rarely hear about them! We encourage everyone to highlight positive parent and school stories, not just crises. Let’s celebrate the silent majority!